Friday, June 12, 2009

Black Eyed Peas

From Slightly Innovative to Embarrassing, Over-Produced, Money Grabbing & Laughable: The Story of The Black Eyed Peas.

They have been around for 11 years now..and were around for two albums before Fergie. Yes, they were slightly innovative. They were hip-hop with a live band. Had a lot of songs that sounded like A Tribe Called Quest.

Listen Example:

http://www.amazon.com/Joints-Jam-Explicit/dp/B000WOXONY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dmusic&qid=1244829459&sr=8-1

Then something happened. An evil cloud draped the skies. A demon reached his hand down and dropped a jar of Nads (hair removal), a bottle of rat poison and Fergie. The Nads went on to cause shrieks from thousands of ladies, and men who want to be ladies. The rat poison killed a litter of baby kittens. Fergie killed a little bit of music for millions. For you zombies, I'm sure it is a bit of life for your musical lifelessness. It will prompt you purchase the next Sean Combs super group from MTV. And another thing! It is zombies like you that make it ok to justify things with statements like, "But you would do it for millions of dollars." Of course I would take the money, but the option shouldn't be there.

Casey

Friday, June 05, 2009

Wait..so how isn't this public?

Check out the last line in the article...

AP Source: GM to sell Saturn brand to Roger Penske

DETROIT – A person briefed on the deal says General Motors Corp. will sell its Saturn brand to former race car driver and dealership chain owner Roger Penske.

GM has scheduled a 9 a.m. EDT conference call with Saturn General Manager Jill Lajdziak. The person briefed on the deal said Penske will be on the call.

Penske has said his company, Penske Automotive Group Inc. of Bloomfield Hills, Mich., is interested in the Saturn brand.

The person briefed did not want to be identified because it has yet to be made public.

AP News on yahoo.com ...good thing it is not public yet.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

This really makes me mad

If you want to believe in your religion, fine.
If you want to believe your "natural" remedies will work with illnesses in your religion ...fine.
If you do not believe we should turn to drugs at every turn to make us feel better. Fine.
If you put your beliefs into someone who does not, and more importantly can not know better, and you risk that person's life ...you should be shot dead in front of the town.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090520/ap_on_re_us/us_forced_chemo

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Love This Headline

(AP today)

Pakistan dropping commandos into Taliban stronghold


G.I. JOE men right?

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Perhaps The Most Ridiculous Waste of Money, Article

http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090428/sc_livescience/soundsscarescrawnypeoplemoreeasily

Let's go over the points to this article:

1. The title is called "Sounds Scare Scrawny People More Easily"
2. The first line is "Scrawny people tend to think approaching sounds are closer than do strong people, a new study found."
3. Now let's look at the meat of this very important finding:

Evolutionary psychologist John Neuhoff and colleagues at the College of Wooster in Ohio asked 50 people to listen to an approaching tone, and press a button when they thought the sound had arrived directly in front of them. The researchers found that almost everyone - about 98 percent of people - pressed the button somewhat early, even after going through 10 practice runs where the scientists told subjects when they were pressing too soon. The average lead time was 130 milliseconds, but some subjects jumped the gun by about 500 milliseconds, or half a second.

The psychologists also rated everyone on a physical fitness scale, based on recovering heart rate after exercise and grip strength. Strikingly, they found scrawny people consistently judged the tone to be right before them sooner than buff people did.


Not only did some jerk, who is probably envied by all at the Acoustical Society, and who probably got grant money, conduct this awesome experiment to BLOW YOUR MIND, also only tested 50 people. 50 PEOPLE!! Any amount over 10 people, and you normally take out the guesswork with anything. That is how they create medicines, and when most of the people die, call it the "Swine Flu" or "Hotel Bombing."

Here is the guy who performed this test: http://jneuhoff.com/

Ok, ok. He seems like a good guy. If you read in there, he used to drive 7 hours to and from home to be with his wife and kids while taking an out of state job. That is admirable. I don't mean to harp on HIM, but rather the WHOLE THING.

Looking further into his website I notice this: "I became interested in links between music and language after hearing a fascinating talk by Ani Patel at APCAM in 2008. I currently have an NSF grant to study these links in more detail."

So I clicked in to see what this NSF grant was, and sure enough he has a grant for this.

Initial Amendment Date: February 10, 2009
Awarded Amount to Date: $38371

$38,371 to find this out ...and for what? Maybe there is better use for that money. This stuff happens all the time too, and I know the clear reasons for studying things, but stuff like this should be put on back burners. Rhesus Monkeys can live in peace. Oh wait! Here is some more from his website:

"Collaborative work with Asif Ghazanfar at Princeton examines the perception and multisensory integration of looming objects in Rhesus monkeys. Our findings support an evolutionary "error management theory " in the perception of both auditory and visual looming perception."

WHO CARES? Why would I want to know the origins and explanations to why Spanish speaking countries like to play drums with shiv knives? Or why would I care that Polish people learned to say the word "Ooh" because that is the sound that comes from a person when you hit him/her in the stomach with a guitar? WHO CARES.

How much do we want to learn here? Do we want to learn so much that it takes away from anything we wonder about in the world? I see so many articles with new research shows "why you're fat" or "DNA links X and X" and I get why it can help in the future. These are beneficial.

Fat Man eats less trans fats
Fat Man's heart doesn't explode
Fat Man doesn't live with an oxygen mask
Fat Man doesn't live off of insurance
Fat Man becomes medium sized man
Fat Man lives a better life
Fat Man teaches his kids better habits
Others pay less
World Better! Weeee!

But what about scrawny people being scared more easily?

Scrawny Man hears Dodge Ram earlier than Buff Man
Scrawny Man moves out of the road .005 seconds earlier than Buff Man.
Buff Man goes to beat the crap out of the Scrawny Man, just for kicks, BUT WAIT! Scrawny man could sense that danger before it happened, then runs back out into road and gets hit by that Dodge Ram.

Where is the return on the investment with most of the research being done?

Well at least the article ends cute:

"Our prediction is that if you're more likely to be a predator, you wouldn't have the need for as great a bias, but if you're a bunny you need a larger margin of safety," Neuhoff said.

Aww...bunnies! (GUN BLAST)

Casey

Monday, December 15, 2008

Our Christmas Cards (with appropriate name)

Dear Ross Beeley,


Merry Christmas!!! We hope you, Ross Beeley, are having a wonderful time these holidays!

We decided to send all of our closest friends and family a Christmas card as this is our first year in Chicago. We will NEVER write one of those “one size fits all” Christmas cards, Ross Beeley, because we feel each of you deserves a personal messsage. So how are your kids (insert name) and (insert name)? He/She (They) must be getting so big! The last we heard, (insert name), had won the big school competition! Congrats to him/her! We don't have kids, but we might as well with our two kittens Professor Plympton and Jean Hackman. Like children, we have to feed and sometimes pay attention to them.


As you can imagine, Chicago is burrrrr cold during the winter, but it is such an amazing and beautiful city. We are always greeted with the amazing skyline while stuck in traffic. Traffic is bad, but we have both perfected a breathing technique with a brown paper bag. How is your city? Winters there are beautiful too, so we are all lucky!


(paragraph 4 here)


Well, Ross Beeley, please keep in touch this year! Tell the kids (insert name) and (insert name) that we said HELLO and HAPPY NEW YEAR!


Here is to us all having a wonderful 2009!


Sincerely,


(signature here)


Jenn & Casey

Monday, December 08, 2008

WHAT A CROCK!

(middle finger) = Freeze that!

Why do all women have to freeze food if there are leftovers, only to throw it away 5 months later with the typical, "WHAT IS THAT?", or "Oh I forgot we had that." I can't even see freezing loaves of bread. I hear why women think they need to freeze loaves of bread ..."so it is there when we need it."

TIME TO DRIVE TO STORE: 9-25 minutes
TIME TO DEFROST: 9-25 hours

I come to you with this important message because I made too much food yesterday while using a glorious cooking tool called the slow cooker (or also known as the "Crock-Pot", as you "Kleenex" and "Chapstick" brand brainwashed people would call it). I made enough chili-spaghetti for about 12 people, so there are leftovers. What did my girlfriend and her mother say? "Oh you can freeze that." What did the lady at work say? Same, same. I am a DUDE. I follow the typical dude route for food. I eat too much during the initial meal. The next day I eat it for breakfast or lunch, then for dinner. I am sick of it the following day, but manage to squeeze it in for one more lunch. If there is any left ...BYE! BYE! Why in the M-F would I want to freeze it, thaw it out in a month, and then eat it again.

TIME TO MAKE NEW CHILI-SPAGHETTI: 4-6 HOURS
TIME TO THAW AND EAT AGAIN: 4-6...MEGA-YEARS!

Back to the slow cooker though for a minute.....

My mother and a few friends (some sweet, sweet dudes) use this thing and actually talk about using it like it was worth telling a story about.

YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN MY DOG ROLL ON THE GROUND YESTERDAY!
LOOK AT THESE PICTURES OF MY BABY!

Well let me tell you something people ...a slow cooker is much more interesting and glorious than a dog or a baby, and should be talked about. SEE BLOG!

You can throw just about anything in there and it will come out beautiful. Just to experiment, I threw a hobo's left moccasin in with some paprika, jello shots, and a 64 ounce fountain blue slushy ...and out came a wonderful pork pot roast. IT WAS JUICY!