My Flight To Portland

Looking out the window on my flight to Portland from Phoenix, I could hardly see the snow covered mountains as we approached the airport. I could hardly see them because the Garga-Skank next to me was hogging the window. Me being in the middle was the result of me flying standby, or else I would have guarded the window with a bowstaff myself. Her hair smelled like beatles.

She, 22-25-years-old with beatle hair and no bra on (hi!) said, "Pretty Cool Huh?"
I said, "Mmm Hmm, Mmm Hmm" like I was a Campbell's Soup can selling crank in a Philladelphia ghetto. I actually thought, "I have no fucking idea. I live near Phoenix, 115 degree weather, and you get to gaze the Rocky Mountain gaze don't you? Oh yeah, keep your head right there in that window and stradle the wall. You have to keep the beatles happy."

As we were passing this glorious mountain, some 9-year-old kid says to his mom, "If you look closely, you will be able to see a penguin."

It just shows you how fucking stupid children are.