Livestrong or Lives Trong?

Everyone was right about Lance Armstrong when they called him a champion, but it turns out to be for another reason. Armstrong is an idea stealing champion of the Far East. While touring Asia, showing people bikes, he came across a very famous Vietnamese singer, who goes by the name of Trong. Trong is not a prostitute.


Trong always gives out t-shirts out at her concerts that translate to English as "Here Lives Trong," as some sort of an ancient Asian gesture of a ringer t-shirt that covers the heart. Fashionable and meaningful, all in one cotton blend.

After Lance took her on a tandem bike ride through the countryside (not by prostitution lairs), Trong wanted to give him something to remember her by, and had a bracelet made for him that said, "Lives Trong." A shirt would not be new for Lance, since he already wore shirts almost everyday. Lance looked at the bracelet and immediately made fun of Trong's brother, Li, who was wearing a questionable cheetah vest. He stated, "Li Vest Rong! Li Vest Rong! That shit is just wrong!" It was the first time Trong had ever met a genius.

It was at this moment that Trong looked to the West


and came up with some elaborate plan to help raise money for cancer research by taking the space out of "Lives Trong" and making it "Livestrong." It would be a yellow rubbery bracelet to be sold in America for $1 each, with proceeds helping cancer research and patients.
After she wrote it down on a piece of paper (not the appointment book of a prostitution house), Lance Armstrong ripped it from her hands and sped away on Trong's unicycle, with a fake mustache and a coconut zinger. She would have been content with a brief bout of sadness, but Lance then created the "Thieving Himmler Asshole Incorporated." He thought the acronym T.H.A.I would be fitting since he believed "they all look Japanese." Trong set out to right the Trong.

Lance would go on to international fame over the Livestrong bracelet, wrote books and was even a finalist for a Nobel prize. Trong ended up striking back with a book of her own:

To this day, Lance still claims the lead in the money raising efforts of the Livestrong bracelet while Trong awaits her day in the court of public opinion (certainly not a harlot house).

Whose story do you believe?

Poem For Just You

Lie and Wait

I had it once, but it got away
like chasing toads on muddy roads

I chased her through flowers down to the bay
I knew I had found when she turned around

Only for sweet seconds that lasted a day
She ran on right by and I started to cry

My mesmerized wit led her astray
Now I must wait and lie at her gate