Things That Bother Me

Someone used the term "craving sweets" the other day to me when they were talking to me, and I can not get it out of my mind. It has been bothering me for three days now.
Craving Sweets
Craving Sweets
Craving Sweets
Yah ...I hate it.

It bothers me like scratching nails on a chalkboard bothers others. Since those types of actions do not really bother me (another example would be scraping a pop sickle stick on your teeth), god has hit me with things that people say. Little terms that people say that get under my skin.

Craving Sweets - If you are not at least 72-years-old, you are not allowed to say this. I am going to put the maximum age at 73 and a half. You get a full 1 year and a half to say "craving sweets." Also, during this 1 year and a half, you can only use the saying one time. If you remember to say it during this period of time, you can not say it around me.

Moist - Not only is this word annoying, it is also disgusting. Moist is used most when people are talking about cake. They are normally middle aged women that really love discussing cake. "Oh my god. This cake is so moist." "Moist cake! How did you do it?" "Betty Crocker right? No? Then how is it so moist?" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Can we switch out moist with ...
--watery goodness
--not dry
--oily
--crisco'd motha fucka
--very good

Tender - Wow. I think of this word in food terms as well. "This chicken is so tender!" "Hey man. You are the grill master! Very Tender Chicken Todd." Other forms of the word do not bother me at all ...
Meat "tenderizer"
Torn "tender" ...heehee. Sort of like a really nice hick explaining his high school wrestling injury.
Legal "tender"
My arm is very "tender" after I fell off the mountain on my tricycle. Ok, I don't like that one either.

"Fall Off The Bone" - I am from the Midwest so talking about ribs (food again, right?) is common. A frequent saying is "Gursh, hardy, well god damnit, gursh durnit, skippy-do! Those ribs fall off the bone!" Apparently the best ribs "fall off the bone." I guess it is because they are so fucking moist and tender, that they fall right off the bone. You can just take a good rib and give it a slight jerk, and fling the valuable tender and moist meat across the room, and still hold on to the bone itself. Seasoning, cooking time, grade of meat and the grillers themselves have no bearing on ribs whatsoever.

There are more, but I am angry now.